Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Bulk Mail

Does anybody ever go through their bulk mail folder?

I use Yahoo! mail for my main email. I have three emails there, one for my "professional" mail, one that I use to save all sorts of teacher documents (before Yahoo! had a 1GB mail storage limit--that's gone now), and one main email I use for everything else, including friends and newsletters that I like to read. I only log in to those first two about once a week, if that.

I know, I know, they say that you should have one junk email for that stuff. But then I have to log in twice, root around for what I want. Yahoo!'s spam filter is very good if you click the spam button on anything you don't want. Every once in a while though, it is too good and I have to go through it to read a couple of the newsletters that I like in my inbox. It does fix itself after I click the "not spam" button.

The funny part is that I get at least 200+ spam messages a day. These all go straight to my bulk mail folder and are gone in a couple of clicks. It amazes me what's in there.

Besides the women who apparently want to talk to me and send me pictures out of nowhere, I also daily win some kind of international lottery. Just today, I won the Spanish and British lottery. I didn't even know that I entered them! I'm rich! Now I can afford to fly those women who email me in to the country!

I also receive multiple messages telling me about being a millionaire on eBay. More and more business partnerships come in where I barely have to work and let my computer work for me. I have offers rolling in constantly.

And the propositions to help those nice people from Burkina Faso just add up. All I have to do is give them my bank account numbers and a small fee and I'm guaranteed several percent of the millions they need to transfer. What could be easier?

My favorites are the ones that apparently can offer discount medicines cheaper than going through conventional methods. Anything I could want is available. Just click on the hazy picture in the email and save hundreds of dollars.

Then there are all the free laptops that are available. Simply go through some internet signups and surveys and they will send one your way. I must have 800 laptops on the way.

Then there are the ones that tell me I am approved for l_oan s and mor_t*gages that I didn't even know I applied for. They have such an interesting and new way to spell their subject headings that you have to take a look. It must be a form of creativity, those headings.

Luckily, all of this is present in my bulk mail folder, all in one nice, easy, and easily locateable place in my email. The best part is that it is all gone in one click.

(If you couldn't tell, yes, I was being facetious and sardonic about these bulk emails. I can't believe, I simply can't believe that anybody falls for any of these. Unfortunately, there must be people out there who do otherwise they wouldn't send them. If they bulk-email out one million messages and get back just one-hundredth of one percent, 0.01%, that's still 100 people. Think about it. 100 people out there, somewhere, fall for those emails we scoff at.)

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